Self-Care Corner: There's No Reward for Doing It Alone

I’ve been thinking a lot about the ways I push through things alone—and how often I’ve mistaken that for strength. I grew up believing that being independent meant not needing help, not asking for anything, and not slowing down.

That mindset of white knuckling my way through pain or anxiety served a purpose at times. But often, it became a barrier to healing.

This month, as I reflect on my self-care, I’ve been paying attention to how I receive help. And to be honest, I’m not great at it. I’ve also noticed the quiet rules I’ve created around what kind of help feels “acceptable.” I think a lot of us do this, we build frameworks in our minds where this kind of help is okay, but that kind isn’t.

I’ve been challenging myself to unlearn that. Because when I really think about it, it doesn’t make much sense. If someone told me they made a choice because they were in physical pain, I wouldn’t question it. I’d just understand that they were doing what’s best for themselves.

But when it comes to my own mental health? My inner critic suddenly wants to label certain supports as "too much" or "not necessary." I’m working on quieting that voice. I’m still learning how to accept help without guilt, without shame, and without the spiral of “what ifs” that often come with anxiety.

Right now, my self-care includes individual therapy, movement, and medication. That’s what’s working for me today. Maybe it won’t work forever—and that’s okay. I’m learning to stay flexible with myself, because I change. The world changes. And it only makes sense that my care would, too.

Even though asking for help still feels hard especially when anxiety fills my head with “what ifs”—I’m learning that just because something is difficult doesn’t mean it’s not valid. I’m learning that receiving support doesn’t make me weak. It makes me human.

There’s no trophy for suffering in silence. No medal for pretending I’m fine when I’m not.

So, I’m learning to ask for help. And I’m trying day by day to give myself the same grace I offer to others.

I hope this serves as a gentle reminder:

You are worthy of finding help that works for you too.

Not the version that someone else says you should need—but the version that supports and sustains you.